Summer with teens ahead? Here’s how to deal

The school bell may have rung for the summer, but for many parents of teens in Singapore, the holidays signal a new challenge: navigating a houseful of young ‘uns who are juggling social pressures, college projects, disrupted kip, and an Olympic-level ability to scroll TikTok for hours without blinking.

“Teenagers need a different kind of support during the summer break,” says Emmanuelle O’Grady, Principal Clinical Psychologist at International Medical Clinic (imc-healthcare.com). “While it might be tempting to fill the holidays with camps, plans and productivity, remember that rest, joy and autonomy are just as important for them.”
It’s not about enforcing strict rules, but helping those who have either returned home for the holidays, or who are just spending more time with you over the coming months, to find structure, meaning and enjoyment in their downtime. “It’s an opportunity for teens to recharge, explore, and grow,” says Emmanuelle, who shares a wealth of expert advice on seamless teen time here.

Reclaiming Sleep

Late night Haji Lane hangouts, Valorant marathons, and endless group chats often wreak havoc on teens’ sleep schedules. “Rather than attempting to enforce rigid rules, involve teens in conversations about why good sleep matters – for their mood, energy and focus,” recommends Emmanuelle. “When they understand sleep as something that benefits them, and see that your concern is not just another parental rule, they’re more likely to take ownership of it.” Gentle boundaries like screen-free wind-down time or wifi cut-offs can also support better health. And if late-night socialising is part of the draw, suggest earlier meetups or offline alternatives with friends.

Ditching The Phone

Helping teens to disconnect from their phones is a global pastime, but banning them altogether isn’t realistic. “The goal isn’t to eliminate phones, but to help teens find fulfilling alternatives,” Emmanuelle says. Thankfully, Singapore is a brilliantly safe place where teens can thrive. “From kayaking around Pulau Ubin and hiking through MacRitchie, to rock climbing or volunteering at a local organisation (check out anza.org.sg/groups/anza-action for ideas), the city offers endless options to keep them busy and stimulated. Continues Emmanualle, “Cultural exploration can also be enjoyed through Singapore’s hawker centre tours, museums, or heritage walks – especially this summer with so many cool SG60 events happening.” And don’t forget, teenagers will also just want to take it easy and hang out with mates on Sentosa, go shopping, or lounge at a cafe with a bubble tea. The key is creating balance, not deprivation.

Balancing Work & Play

Many teens take on part-time jobs or internships over the holidays, which is great for experience and character-building, but exhausting without balance. “Parents can help by mapping out realistic weekly schedules that include work, rest, social time, and personal interests,” Emmanuelle explains. “Encouraging teens to block out ‘non-negotiable’ downtime, like a quiet afternoon at home, a workout, or a meetup with friends, will help them not to think that their break is like a second school term.” It’s also helpful to check in with them regularly, not to micromanage, but to ask how they’re feeling about their schedule. Says Emmanuelle, “Ultimately, the goal is to help teens learn how to manage responsibilities while still making time to recharge and enjoy the freedom of the time off.”

Protecting Rest

Singapore’s competitive academic culture can make teens (and adults!) feel guilty about relaxing, but by integrating regular, guilt-free rest into your child’s routine, they can feel more balanced and less like burning out. “Parents can reframe rest as an essential part of success,” says Emmanuelle. “Encourage them to view downtime as an investment in their mental and physical wellbeing, which is essential for sustaining long-term focus, creativity, and overall performance.” Instead of justifying taking a break with ‘productive’ activities, remind them that chilling out, hobbies, and spending time with friends or family helps to boost the brain.” Encourage passive and active rest – listening to music, doodling, mindfulness, or catching up with mates. Kicking back isn’t wasted – it’s fuelling them for what’s next. And don’t forget to model this yourself!

Encouraging Life Skills

A summer at home is ideal for instilling some real-world confidence. “Talk to your teen about taking ownership of small tasks like planning a meal, managing a grocery budget, or organising a day out with friends,” says Emmanuelle. Apps for recipe planning or budgeting can add a fun tech twist. (Tasty by BuzzFeed is swipe-friendly and customisable). “Teens respond well when they see a practical benefit – saving money for something they want, or impressing mates with a new dish. Without them fully realising, steps such as this lead towards independence and can make the break feel more purposeful.”

Sharing The Load

With domestic helpers common in Singapore, it’s easy for teens to avoid rolling up their sleeves and grappling with the Harpic. But responsibility builds character. “Start with a family conversation,” Emmanuelle advises. “Frame chores as shared contributions, not punishments.” Involve teens in creating a chore schedule and let them choose tasks – setting the table or helping with the food shop. “Incentives like a night out or payment for bigger jobs can help,” she adds. And remember, praise and appreciation go a long way. “When teens feel valued, they’re more likely to take ownership.”

Mastering Time Management

Without the structure of school or college, many teens can drift aimlessly through the day. “Encourage them to set daily or weekly goals – reading (an actual!) book, revising for exams, or learning something new,” suggests Emmanuelle. “Planners or scheduling apps (like Trello or MyStudyLife) can help make time feel more intentional.” It’s also a good idea to help break larger tasks into smaller chunks and encourage reflection: What’s energising? What’s draining? “It’s about developing self-awareness and building habits that support better self-management,” Emmanuelle continues. If homework is looming, support with revision planning can also reduce stress.

Monitoring Screen Use

Removing the use of screens is never going to happen but, says Emmanuelle, rather than spying on your teen’s tech habits over the summer, involve them in discussions about healthy digital boundaries. “Parents can set limits collaboratively, using tools like screen-time trackers or app timers (try Forest or Moment) while talking openly about the impact of screen overuse.” As a parent, what you can do is watch for signs that tech is taking a toll, such as causing irritability, headaches, poor sleep, or anxiety in your child when separated from devices. “The focus shouldn’t be on eliminating phone use, but on helping teens find a healthier balance between their digital and real-world lives,” she says.